Personally, this message constantly being slammed into my brain through social media is tiring. Yes yes, I get it, I have to make differences in my life to have new things and learn things and be a better person and all that. But sometimes, or all of the time depending, making changes in your life looks like scary business. They say you want to get out of your comfort zone, but there’s a reason that zone has the word ‘comfort’ in it – that’s the place with the blankets and the biscuits and the less worry.
And yet. Despite my annoyance with this slogan, I did indeed make a change this year. I changed my location. Something that for someone like me is a little bit astounding (if I do say so myself). You stay where you are because you tell yourself you have reasons to, really important reasons. Financial, educational, family is where you are, you have a life there, dammit! And then, you move and you realise that you can do the things here that you wanted to do there. You realise you don’t have to be trapped by a part time job. You are just a train ride from that family, or a phone call. You aren’t actually that worse off financially despite having new monetary responsibility.
In other words, despite the anxiety and fear telling you not to do it, when you do do it, you are okay.
Of course, this post is coming from the perspective of a young person with no real responsibilities. I don’t have children or tenure or a practice. I’m not tired to a place. I thought I was, and then when I accepted an invitation to come live where I am now I realised that I am not yet tied anywhere, but if I could be, it wouldn’t be so bad to be tied here in the big city with all the new opportunities. (Opportunities that I have not yet indulged in besides visiting a pet store, this in part to the heatwave and now to the fact I am an allergic mess. But it feels nice knowing they are there.)
It’s possible after all that if you do accept those nagging suggestions to go make a difference in your own life you will enjoy them. Who knew? Soon enough this change will become the regular but for now I am going to keep on enjoying the way I managed to convince me – queen-of-scared-of-change – to try something new. You try something new, you really do build some better onto yourself. Even if it seems small to others.
And don’t worry, you don’t have to go skydiving to take a risk. Fuck heights.